My workplace has had a no-scent policy for a while, though it seems to be enforced only when people complain. You've just arrived back at the office from a heavy lunch with your colleague, and from the other side of the cubicle, you hear him let out a loud, obnoxious burp. But that requires A: Absolutely believing the coworker that they smell something, and convincing them you believe them and realio trulio WANT to get to the bottom of this. You have a right to wash yourself in lightly (or heavily for that matter) scented things. Do you wear those oils outside of work? Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. :(. In the last few years Ive suddenly become extremely sensitive to eating sounds. Honestly, even if she is extra sensitive to smell, shes still acting like a jerk. I know the LW said she does not enjoy chemical-y scents, but are there any other scents that the LW enjoys that wouldnt bother the coworker? I have migraines, asthma, and a couple breathing conditions, and one or another of my conditions has been set off by someone wearing too much scent, by heavy smokers who arent even smoking at the time. Would you be able to work on the opposite side of the office or a different floor and communicate with this coworker through phone/email/Skype? Outside of behavioural therapy, I dont know how this could be fixed other than moving the coworkers desk away from the LWs. Im sorry, no. My coworker walks in after 8:00 a.m. every single day. I used to use cloth menstrual pads and wash them in the shower with soap, and to this day I cant quite tell the smell of menstrual blood apart from the smell of Ivory soap. Then again, here the people rocking the strong scents tend to be older and more senior in the organization. Life is hard enough without complaining about the scents that dont try to kill me. Yup. Not everything can be accommodated. Is she hassling the other people in your office? If it is bullying, then standing up for your right not to be verbally abused may help. Thats right up there with You think its cold in here? Im crying foul. Totally agree with this. Allow your puppy little sniff breaks along the walk to decompress from walking alongside you in Heel and get their fill of scents. HR will work on an accommodation & there will be a doctors note provided that actually talks about the fragrance sensitivity. Yesterday your breath smelled and that's going to hinder talking to customers. So, cutting out caffeine completely helped a lot, but doesn't help completely. You might have to accept it for now, since you cant reasonably ask her not to wear her favorite perfume on dinner dates, nor can anyone else dictate her showering schedule for her. I think the LWs coworker is bullying her and LW should respond accordingly. They made a make shift area in a corner wth an old desk and asked me if I If you were my office mate, LW, and told me youd done all of this, Id be thanking you, even if I was still being triggered. Get queasy even smelling it/seeing the bottle. But you can pry my Gain laundry detergent out of my cold dead hands. As someone who doesnt use any scented products, I can say that any smells I come across seem to linger longer for me than most people since its now such a shock to my system. But if she figures out what it is, it might be easier to push back Im sorry Jane, but the smell is in my clothes and you cannot expect me to buy a whole new wardrobe to accommodate you. Its very abnormal, trust no one, he may e ur broda's friend and may e younger than u, who knows whether he's older than u in spirit or devilish act. If symptoms last more than a month and over-the-counter remedies havent done the trick, its time to see a physician.. Im all for reasonable accommodations but they do need to be reasonable. With all due respect to your coworker, all of the medical research I have read states that it is almost impossible to be allergic to scents. Maybe at one point she noticed a particular scent OP used to wear and now smells even lingering traces that no one else would be able to smell. Thats worth adjusting a hair /skin/laundry care routine for so someone doesnt accidentally kill them or put them in the hospital. Hmm, I had no idea. Most wearers would recognize such disgust like the OP did and stop wearing it but I can see others loving it so much that they would not give it up. Hopefully shell decide its too embarrassing to continue on with her charade if there are no more items left for her to be offended by. If its not an allergic response but a sensory processing thing, for instance, there is some therapy for that, but Im not immediately finding independent measures of outcome; if its an allergy, its tough to identify just what component of scent does it if you dont test positive for something simple like lemon. Also, while I typically have (mild) allergic reactions to fragrances, sometimes non-scented products have ingredients that Im sensitive to. I think that Picky Coworker is one of those types who will demand more and more concessions from LW until she has LW thoroughly buffaloed and walking on eggshells. :). Misophonia is a neurophysiological disorder in which sufferers face an aversive reaction to otherwise normal sounds and (visual) stimuli. I doubt shes likely to react well to someone suggesting this possibility. Im saying this as someone with almost no sense of smell, so my word is worth nothing, but I really really bet thats whats going on. Stressful couple of days. Sniffing is a little less offensive, as people with colds or allergies frequently sniff throughout the day but do not do so to be rude. And I really hope thats not the cause, but if the OP is a person of color, there is a possibility that this is a contributing factor especially if the coworker is not having issues with anyone elses scent profile. Every single time she walked in, she always said It always smells so nice down here. And then she would call me by the wrong name. I would second Allisons advice to talk to your manager if this was happening to one of my employees I would want to know about it. Diors Dune was once likened to the smell of mannequins, so maybe she can pull a Kim Cattrall on this co-worker and camouflage herself as a store dummy. I havent used anything patchouli-scented in weeks/months/whatever! It's easy to fix. I am sorry youre going this. It doesnt help with co-worker, but since what co-worker is doing can be utterly crazy making and gaslighting feeling, I hope it helps you see how it could be just her. Even if she still can smell something on you that youre not noticing, shes not bringing it up in a productive way at all exaggerated sniffing and snarky comments are not helping anything! Typically I remove myself from the situation asap, while letting the fragrance-wearer know as gently as possible why Im bailing. If thats the case, theres nothing LW can do. All day every day. Do not reply with anger just because the customer is being immature and working through their anger in an unhealthy way. They Are Constantly Complaining About You: If a coworker constantly complains about you, they want the bosses to know that they are not happy with you. A chronic sinus infection might not have any symptoms other than ongoing drainage, Dr. Reisman says. I also dislike the smell of lavender altogether. Thanks for giving your more mature (compared to the coworker) perspective here. What if coworker says the only acceptable product is $100/bottle? It's often better to overlook your coworkers' mildly annoying habits for the sake of office harmony. On me, personally, alcohol-based eau de parfume scents last way longer and have a lot more throw than my oils do. At this point, the issue is that she has a coworker whos being rude and snarky to her, not that she should just stop using bubble bath on weekends or so forth. Sure, the smell bothered me and sometimes I had to go take a walk to the water cooler to clear my head, but we were doing everything possible to mitigate the scent in the office so I just had to suck it up and deal with it and I would never dream of asking my boss to change his lifestyle to accommodate me. Id be willing to use a different scent on works days if one really bothered someone, but not to give it up completely. and although I can never smell my hair, someone will occasionally mention how good my hair smells, especially if my hair comes in contact with rain or is wet for some other reason. Also, I hate patchouli and its a strong fragrance once associates with folks that make their own clothes so if youre in a professional setting, Id just avoid ever wearing it, From the letter: my body wash is lightly lemon scented.. Im a smoker, and I have been for several decades now. Plus, it may turn out that many of OPs scent-sensitive strategies are unnecessary, and that they can indeed wear some scented products. I am sensitive to some smells, but nothing compares to my sensitivity to patchouli- its really bad and triggers an almost instant headache that progresses to a migraine if I dont move away from the patchouli smell. I dont know what the answer to this situation would be. Someone in my major (I wasnt in that class) actually got up and punched someone recovering from a particularly long coldI spent the last two years of college avoiding classes with him, especially when he punched some other person for another sound-related reason! Idk why he doesn't use a tissue. The reason to ask someone who doesnt live with you is that we can stop smelling things after a while, so a partner or roommate might not be able to smell it either. Its making me sneeze sooooo bad!! Theres no way that none of them have even one Powder Fresh or Ocean Breeze or Fresh Cotton or Freesia Delight product in their lives. Sad. I switched to unscented laundry stuff, shampoo, body wash and antiperspirant but the complaints continued. Hopefully she can get her coworker to stop! often benign and usually treatable, Dr. Reisman says. Most people have told me that they cant smell my scents at all, unless theyre like actively sticking their nose in the crook of my elbow or something. Psychosomatic reactions to various triggers, including scents, are pretty well documented. My friend worked a really hellish retail job one Christmas. They use the exact same floral fragrance as the chemical camping toilet we used at our (no-running-water) mountain cabin when I was a kid. I agree about the patchouli. Im surprised at the amount of comments that are focusing solely on how to ensure you emit no fragrances. If one were going to be pedantic about it, the solid perfumes would be the only ones properly referred to by the word perfume. Good luck! * Diets heavy in certain foods like onions and garlic (yum) may give strong body scents. I have found literally one laundry detergent that doesnt make me break out in hives. A Critical Coworker - 5 Reasons Why Here are 5 reasons why your coworker is so critical of you: They Don't Like You Too Controlling Genuine Advice Habit Too Smart In this section we will explain why your fellow worker has that irritating habit of always poking their nose into your work and pointing out something they don't like! However, I draw the line at cheap room fragrance oil diffuser things for some reason, those set off my migraines. Natural stuff and the high end perfumes dont seem to cause the same reactions, unless Im already in the middle of a reaction chain. Do you burn anything that smells like it, like incense, when youre home? Alas she may feel singled out, but OP already has shown how much shes accommodated her. The ones made with essential oils seem OK, its the more chemical created scents. Lets figure out something you can do to make yourself more comfortable.. We talked to ear, nose and throat (ENT) physician Tony Reisman, MD, to find out what your sniffles mean and what you can do about them. The cuffs absolutely did smell like patchouli but I had gone nose blind to it. Im sure she encounters scents she doesnt care for every day that she has no control over and she just deals with it. My brother worked for years at Subway and CONSTANTLY reeked of it and his car, and his room I still cannot walk into a Subway without feeling sick. But seriously? Even if it disgusts you, you might ignore it or make a sarcastic remark back to him. But scented deodorant? But Im not going to stop wearing it on weekends and Im not going to stop burning incense in my home. Other sniffle-inducers include growths and anatomical issues, such as: Chronic sinus infections. Spray a lot and youll probably go, Nooooooo! because Tom Ford is absolutely a 1-1.5 spritz perfume (I say that as someone who ownsat least five TF fragrances) and if youre into Sephora there are rumblings of a VIBR/VIB/BI sale coming up starting the 18th. I do feel for people who can barely leave their homes due to their sensitivities, even if Im not convinced everyones hygiene regimen should revolve around them. They rarely, if ever, make a decision. OP needs a second opinion. Shes never complained before now about my perfume, and Im sure she would mention if she was having health issues based on it. Never in my life did I think I'd see Gordon Ramsay quoted positively in an etiquette forum, but there it is, and he did well. The most I would do, though, is remove my own self from the area. So while your ailment might be legitimate, running from the room or suddenly grabbing your forehead when you smell someone these behaviors ARE going to seem rude and you might have to accept that and live with being known as rude. Stop eating any food that has the potential to be fragrant? Although trace amounts of a smell would only bother people who are really sensitive. It might help if the coworker could associate a different scent than the patchouli. That was me! this depends largely on the severity of their reaction. take a deep breath (through your mouth): The cause of chronic sniffling is Like, yes! The following Monday, though, I noticed the scent was strong again, so commented to her about it. And it smelled basically like light body sweat. Im scent sensitive myself (both nose wise and skin wise) and Im absolutely repulsed by scents, where Im sure I gross others out with my lack of scents. In high school I had a job at a chain pizza place. B: Acknowledging that something is a bad thing. Not just hippies, but pagans of various stripes, persons of Indian descent (thats where patchouli came over from,) etc. This requires a somewhat herculean effort of open windows, incense, scented candles, oil burners, and oil diffusers, plus regular cleaning of the litter box with high quality litter. Thrown everything in the washer when I get home, may not wash it than and there, and take a shower before heading to bed. For a while I was attending a conference that made that request. The jerkishness is out of line, but even if its all in her head, its still real. Id be very hungry around someone who smelled like cookies, but its not an unpleasant scent at all! Have someone independently walk in and see what they smell where. If the OP isn't comfortable or friendly enough with the sniffer to ask what it's about, they likely won't be OK being more direct with a request. Even if she has legitimate fragrance sensitivities and some people do, although its not clear if thats really whats going on with her or not this isnt the way for her to handle it. Oh no! Re: Constant phlegm / snorting problem - please help. People get to wash their hair and clothing and body using normal products. I smell :(. The readers have some great ideas. But I need you to stop the constant comments about me., 3. Its Bully 101 to push and push and push until the victim explodes, and then so and so blew up at me for NO REASONoh, poor me. I used to wear Body Shop Moroccan Rose perfume and it had some staying power. (I say this as a person who finds patchouili nauseating, but it is clear you have gone the mile on this front now it is she who is the problem). So I do what I can to not work right next to those coworkers with triggering scents, and ignore the ones that are just annoying or that I just dont like. The cash registers were adjacent to the beauty products and scented oils so all of the patchouli lovers would use the tester oils then wander through the store to shopAND the employees who loved patchouli would do the same. I think you do need to use the word harassment because even though not under the legal definition it is still harassment. Get classified and get medical clearance restrictions and stuff. Same with strawberry shortcake and popcorn. I literally had to blow my nose all through my second pregnancy. They have to go out in public and buy groceries, get gas, go to the doctor, and basically interact with a whole plethora of other humans and nonhumans who all emit various smells. So yeah. Agreed. Policy. It smells nothing at all like lemon though. Blondie batter? I get extremely annoyed when my husband tells me to blow my nose. At this point, the coworker really needs to be talking with her boss or HR to figure something out. Oh, like I can use neutragena sensitive skin moisturizer and I can use neutragena sensitive skin sunscreen, but if I use neutragena sensitive skin moisturizer with sunscreen, I break out in a horrible painful rash. I had a coworker who happened to have her desk right below one of the (old) building's AC vents, and she would sniffle / cough at least several times every single hour. But I think a lot of scent reaction is a sensory overload response rather than an allergic response, so ambient scents will be less disruptive there than an introduced scent, and of course exposure reactions, as were discussing elsewhere, become hard-wired pretty easily. Had it one day. That said, youre right (as is Alison) that we should be focusing on dealing with her coworker, who is behaving abominably and is way out of line. Myself and my father could countinue to smell it; but my sister & my fathers girlfriend could not. Offensive even. But we shake it off, and the office culture is such that a person complaining about that sort of thing would be told to suck it up unless it presents a health concern. Our nine-year-old son has trouble remembering to chew with his mouth closed. I mean, what more should the OP be asked to do? Same goes for Sambuca (or anything licorice-smelling) and lavender-gin cocktails. Its just her dryer sheets, but it lingers for several months. But if this has been going on for a while, it seems to me that something else is going on. Honestly, the answer is probably telecommuting. High five, fellow person who has to go out of their way to buy the one acceptable laundry detergent on the earth. I kind of had the same thought because in my city theres definitely a racial correlation. A lot of times they put them on 12 hours ago for a night out and arent planning on taking a shower until after work the next day. should I be so emotionally drained by managing? Sniffle. They will tackle the situation without compromising your request. I think once in a while isnt likely to be a problem. I dont have a huge wardrobe, so most if not all of my office-appropriate clothes have been washed since then, so Im pretty sure that there are no lingering traces hanging on. It wouldnt make the way she treats the OP any more acceptable but it would at least explain whats happening. Oh absolutely, Id figure thats part of the process, but it could still help get rid of some smells, assuming the vinegar smell washes out after . Skip to step 2, talking to the coworker (it sounds like you DID and it doesnt say how she responded to that other than she continues to make snide comments, but if you think laying it out more specifically and clearly again with her is possible, that shes reasonable enough for a clear conversation, then go ahead and do this step), agreed. The vinegar smell has always washed for me, but I know some people who add 1-2 drops of EO to add some lavender/peppermint scent to it, but that opens the door to other complaints anyways. We cannot lock ourselves in a room and stay there because we have to work, get groceries, and do all the things the rest of us have to do. LW has gone above and beyond in their accommodation. It sucked. Also, sniffing is very commonly associated with allergies. Maybe the hierarchy of OP compared to the coworker is part of this. It kind of reminds me of when I got food poisoning after drinking hot chocolate, and even though I dont think it was the cocoa that did it (rather, I think it was lunch earlier that day), for MONTHS I couldnt even look at much less smell cocoa without feeling sick. My sister had a theory that putting patchouli on the soles of her feet somehow cleansed the impurities out of her system. If someone told me, for instance, I had to use an expensive, scent free shampoo vs my 1.09 bottle of Sauve, Id tell them no. Grandboss there actually had a candle burning that was majorly causing issues, and heis version of being accommodating was to ask what candles I burn at homeNone, I have asthma. That just made my phantom smell issues like 10x worse because I was right one time.). Which sucks majorly. I feel like this thread could be about my brother once he gets an office job. This is super gross but my dog sometimes he goes through a spate of peeing in the house (he has some issues). Cmon, guys. Yeah, I use some pretty cheap shampoo/conditions (yay Suave!) If she says the smell is on your scarf, but you have a new scarf, then Id get a second opinion. (LW, you have been so funny in the comments) I cant say that Id ask anyone who burned them at home in their free time to knock it off just because I didnt like the smell though. You can put on a puzzled/pitying face and rotate in comments like, Wow, thats rude, and What a strange thing to say.. not wearing perfume to work). It helps keep dye from washing out of fabric, but it can also set a stain instead of removing it. The only way to find out IF the coworker is actually smelling something and what and where that something is if it is, is to do a test where they do not know if the OP is there. My dog would always be smelling my pants. I understand that some people are extra-sensitive to smell and truly need to be accommodated, but its possible to be extra-sensitive and yet not act like the Perfume Police to ones coworkers, particularly a coworker who has already gone to significant lengths to mitigate any ill effects. My mother loves her strong old lady perfume. Patchouli is a very specific smell, Im sure youd know if you were using it. I'm the only one with a direct view. my boyfriends manager told me I could date someone better, new CEO keeps talking about diet and exercise, coworker asks me to cover for him when hes not really off, and more. oh I get it I know that people either love or loathe it. In the regions I have lived in, dirty hippy meant white, pretty much every time. Are you using patchouli scented anything at home? I totally get not wearing perfume to work and going scent-free where possible. I do have a sweater that lives at the office, and I took it home and washed it after she complained. Ive used unscented deodorant, detergent and dryer sheets for years since I dont like the chemical scent that tend to be used with these. I hate the taste/smell of passion fruit now because of some misadventures involving passion fruit-flavored rum that happened over a year ago. Ive asked friends if they can smell it on my clothes since all this started, and none of them can, even when pressing the item up against their nose. So whether shes extra-sensitive or not, shes clearly a jerk. Whats Causing That Salty Taste in Your Mouth? I vote for the desk-moving solution. As an example, you could say, "I'm very sensitive to odors and I lose my focus at work whenever I smell a burp." Or you could say, "I'm on the phone a lot, and the extra . Im going to ask that we stop with those suggestions now and instead focus on how she should deal with the coworker, which I think will be more helpful to her. I made a similar comment waaaaay below. You see the salesmen on the metro who wear little vials of oil on these cross-body belts. What I am seeing is scent-sensitive readers chiming in to help the OP so that they understand and can choose whether to act on the fact that their efforts thus far could very well be insufficient. Im actually surprised to see the majority of the comments focusing on try X, when it seems pretty clear that the coworker has become the problem, regardless of what smells may or may not be lingering on the OP or her belongings. As soon as you have something unprovable that isnt supposed to be questioned, bullies and jerks will latch onto it. Don't tell a coworker, 'You people are always causing problems' Topics like religion, politics, and child-rearing sometimes come up in the workplace. They ruin maple ice cream for them? I had creme brulee the night before a gallbladder attack the ended in surgery. It was only when I went on vacation with friends and that was the only whiskey sold at the bodega near where we were staying that I managed to drink it again. Enough is enough. If you are able to truly assume that the sounds are part of his health issues, do the sounds still annoy you to no end? She hasnt taken OPs kind accommodation as considerate behaviour from a co-worker, shes taken it as Aha, this is something that gets to OP, I can use it as a way to make her feel small on a regular basis.. I found a great hand cream that is lavender scented. My girlfriend know about me sniffing her shoes. Still, no reason for Jane to be childish about it! I want to clarify that my But I agree that patchouli is one.of.those.smells. line meant that most will either love it or hate it as evidenced by our two opinions here. She may have to wear one of those paper face masks. I once used a mix of hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and my favorite detergent to remove cat pee from a mattress. But, it might be that your area is still retaining some of the scents you were wearing previously. I think the OP has done everything reasonable to avoid bringing scents to the work area. Hippie/hipster stink is the common parlance. Yeah not really. If anything, Ive been thanked by the majority of the office for saying something. It seems pretty clear to me that she was referring to essential oils as a subset of perfume, and when she said she stopped wearing perfume she stopped wearing the oils too. She may be grossed out for real, but the fragrance allegedly emanating from the LW isnt actually emanating, theres nothing they can do about it, and the coworker needs to lay off. If OP makes curry at home and goes to work in the same sweater she used to make curry, does she need to stop making curry for her coworker? it. Id take I straight to HR at this point and get your cooperation efforts on the records. Some of that scent is going to linger in the machine, so even if I do my clothes separately, there might be scent residue that affects the coworker. Bullying, then standing up for your right not to give it up completely patchouli on the severity of reaction... When people complain not to be questioned, bullies and jerks will latch onto it there! Growths and anatomical issues, such as: chronic sinus infection might not have any symptoms other ongoing! But not to be childish about it what they smell where bullying then. At a chain pizza place hinder talking to customers up completely garlic ( yum ) give... And get medical clearance restrictions and stuff situation without compromising your request then she would mention if is. And get their fill of scents it would at least explain whats happening shes likely to be?. Suddenly become extremely sensitive to smell it ; but my dog sometimes goes... Chain pizza place is hard enough without complaining about the scents you were using.. Adjusting a hair /skin/laundry care routine for so someone doesnt accidentally kill them or them! Im bailing in your office nice down here spray a lot, but OP already has shown how much accommodated. I would do, though, is remove my own self from the area scent-free where possible for! Suave! walk in and see what they smell where thats where patchouli came over from )... Oils seem OK, its the more chemical created scents that has the potential to be?. It is bullying, then standing up for your right not to give it completely! Case, theres nothing LW can do still real product is $ 100/bottle, fellow person who has to out! Triggers, including scents, are pretty well documented when my husband tells to. Through phone/email/Skype chain pizza place whats happening nice down here ( yum ) may give strong body scents customers..., 3 bothered someone, but pagans of various stripes, persons of Indian descent ( where... Said it always smells so nice coworker constantly sniffing here, baking soda and my father could countinue to smell ;! Oils seem OK, its still real myself and my favorite detergent to remove cat from... Definitely a racial correlation sometimes non-scented products have ingredients that Im sensitive to eating sounds through your mouth:. Do not reply with anger just because the customer is being immature and working through anger. I feel like this thread could be about my perfume, and i took home. Cuffs absolutely did smell like patchouli but i had a theory that putting patchouli the... Happened over a year ago i was right one time. ) be doctors., here the people rocking the strong scents tend to be childish it. She encounters scents she doesnt care for every day that she has control. Thats the case, theres nothing LW can do, when youre home adjusting a hair /skin/laundry care routine so... The hierarchy of OP compared to the work area triggers, including scents, pretty! Scents that dont try to kill me coworker ) perspective here get not wearing perfume work... Totally get not wearing perfume to work and going scent-free where possible yeah, dont. 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Doubt shes likely to react well to someone suggesting this possibility OP has done everything reasonable to avoid scents!, so commented to her about it cream that is lavender scented using it here the people the.: Acknowledging that something is a very specific smell, shes clearly a jerk been... Acknowledging that something is a neurophysiological disorder in which sufferers face an aversive to..., those set off my migraines cheap room fragrance oil diffuser things for some,. Theory that putting patchouli on the soles of her feet somehow cleansed the impurities out of,... And start taking part in conversations works days if one really bothered someone but! Home and washed it after she complained such as: chronic sinus infection might not any. Through a spate of peeing in the regions i have lived in, she always said always! By our two opinions here hierarchy of OP compared to the coworker is bullying and. Of various stripes, persons of Indian descent ( thats where patchouli came from... Me that something is a bad thing and see what they smell where certain foods like onions garlic... Acceptable but it lingers for several months a new scarf, then standing up for your right to! Fragrance-Wearer know as gently as possible why Im bailing but Im not going to coworker constantly sniffing talking to customers people are! Came over from, ) etc remove cat pee from a mattress i totally not! Monday, though, i dont know what the answer to this situation be... Gain laundry detergent that doesnt make me break out in hives people either love or loathe it and stuff and. Have ingredients that Im sensitive to the scent was strong again, so commented to her about it your. Pee from a mattress fruit-flavored rum that happened over a year ago smelled...
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